Let the randomness begin!
It's cooler to say that you told Mrs. Hillbilly Mom to F-off to explain your two days in ISS than it is to say you refused to stop talking on your cell phone as you entered class.
Just so you know...I'm not putting my self into rehab. I'm not mixing prescription medications. I don't have hoarding issues. I'm not loaning myself money to continue my campaign for President. I'm not dropping out of the presidential race. Just so you know.
Sunday night, I am going to see Kathy Griffin. Not like in a visit to her house to play pinochle or have a scrapbooking party or help her with her act. No. Like, going to watch her perform at the Fabulous Fox.
Some people just need a good thrashing.
I don't mean Kathy Griffin, though some would beg to differ.
Friday is the best day of the week. Due to the anticipation.
Thursdays are not a very creative day of the week, apparently.
The school year is almost over, you know. There is only a quarter and a half left. That's not much, if you're comparing the school year to a cookie.
I ordered some Girl Scout Cookies at work. Thin mints and those coconut kind that nobody likes but me.
HH has a heavy tread. Especially when he returns from bowling, and clomps about on the tile floor of the master bathroom whilst I am below in my basement lair.
It is time for those celebrity freaks in rehab with Dr. Drew.
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8 comments:
I just read that a mayor in MO got shot. Wasn't your mayor relative, was it?
DPA,
It's been on the TV all night. It happened around 7:00. Thank the Gummi Mary, it was not my brother-in-law the mayor.
You know who needs a good thrashing? The people here! It was hard to restrain yesterday.
When I am dictator of the world, or at least my own country, NO Italians will EVER be allowed to immigrate to my country!!! EVER!!!!
Yesterday, again, it took us 2 hours to get home. 2 hours for a 7 mile drive, a normal 20-30 minute drive. I swear to God everyone here is 40
going on 8. The country is run by people 40 going on 8. It is like Lord of the Flies, and you know how well that turned out. Only I think those kids were more organized!!
My husband bought this collapsable baton to keep in the car for "safety." I don't know how safe it is really going to be, because I kept thinking,
"I could just get out with that baton and start beating the crap out of people." I could taste it. I wanted to smash their heads in.
I gotta get out of here. I keep thinking, "What if this is going on when I am in labor? I really will have this kid in the car."
And also, because of said kid I can't HAVE any wine to calm down. I did order some of those delicious Samoas (coconut Girlscout cookies.) They are the best and will sooth my soul when they arrive!
Are you really going to see the real Kathy Griffin? The one and only? Cause if you are, I'm jealous. While her complete and total lack of a moral compass (as well as her weird fondness for all things homosexual) makes my stomach hurt a little, I still think she's fkn hilarious.
Oh, and I love the coconut kind of girl scout cookies too! Samoas or something. I ordered some about 3 weeks ago from a student. Haven't seen them yet. She probably lost the order form in the same place she lost her homework.
I love Celebrity Rehab, but that one guy that has been in the wheelchair off and on gets on my damn nerves. Is it just me or is he faking it a bit? And the know-it-all Baldwin guy irks me too, but I guess he's gone now. Someone should have told him that having been in rehab ninety eight times does not qualify you to counsel others. It's hilarious to me that he was the first one to leave when he was the one telling everyone else to stay.
I'm glad your brother in law did not get shot.
End hijacking.
UnGal,
Create your own country! Do it now! Get those borders locked!
Sweet Gummi Mary! How does it take 2 hours to drive 7 miles? Are these 8-year-oldish Italians riding tricycles? You'd be better off running with the bulls. Make a note of that for your new country: After work each day, there will be a mandatory running of the bulls on major thoroughfares.
Funny you should mention Lord of the Flies. My freshmen have been reading that, and had a test on it today. There was much bickering over whether Piggy drowned or was stabbed. I would hate to see their test scores.
Baton? We can't relate to that here in Hillmomba, where the weapon of choice is a shotgun.
I used to work with a lady who gave birth in her car. Her husband delivered their third daughter on the shoulder of the highway. He then drove her to the hospital, where she got out of the car and promptly plopped the afterbirth onto a nurse's shoe, while her husband proclaimed, "That seat is ruined!" Not that I want to worry you or anything, seeing as how you can't have wine right now. Or even a Samoa, because they won't arrive until March, I'm told.
DPA,
Kathy Griffin ROCKS! Too bad her dad died. The Mom and Dad show was as funny as Kathy, without even trying.
Girl Scout Cookies won't arrive for another month. Here in Missouri, anyway. Y'all down in Mississippi may not get any, what with the fat people hoarding them in case their restaurant privileges are revoked.
That darn Jeff Conaway was also on Celebrity Fit Club (without the wheelchair, but high as a kite) and pissed everyone off there, too. The Baldwins all make me think of Fred Flintstone.
My Bro-In-Law is safe in his home with a security system that shouts "INTRUDER, INTRUDER!" when it is set off. Believe me, I know.
Hint: Keebler makes a cookie called "Grasshoppers" that taste JUST LIKE GS Thin Mints and are a heckuva lot cheaper.
Not that I think you're poor and can't afford GS cookies that are like what, $97 a box now, but I'm just trying to help out the gal I share a husband with. And share a love for ending sentences with prepositions.
Sound like your BIL has a state of the art security system there... does it also shout "DANGER, WILL ROBINSON?"
I can't stand coconut, so I can't back you on the Samoas/Caramel Delights (they have different names in different parts of the country) but I could easily blow a paycheck on the Lemon ones and the Thanks-a-Lots. Fortunately, no Girl Scouts came by my house this year...
at least that's what I said in my deposition, so I'm sticking to my story!
Diva,
I've had the Grasshoppers! I found them at Save-A-Lot. After eating them, I forgot about them. I'll have to check the cookie aisle at The Devil's Playground. But at school, I was scratching a back whose daughter is selling the cookies, with hopes that my back will be scratched when my son has a fundraiser.
StewyouwouldnotlastonSurvivor,
No to the Will Robinson, though my BIL does seem to be Lost in Space at times.
As for the lack of Girl Scouts in your neighborhood, methinks your photo might be on the poster warning the young lasses not to go door-to-door.
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