Friday, August 3, 2007

Reading Shenanigans Nuke CiCi's

I am really not much interested in writing anything tonight. I started to craft a literary masterpiece this afternoon, but all I got was...nothing. So I went on about my business, started a new book, watched a repeat of some NORAD thingy on the History Channel, and went to CiCi's Pizza with HH and our spawn. Now I am even more less interested in writing. So here's a synopsis of my day.

ER was not on TBS this morning because of that infernal golf tournament thingy that TBS also televised yesterday. So I had to watch some cartoons and start a new book, Dark At The Roots, by Sarah Thyre. Let me tell you, it is freakin' hiliarious. I can't put it down; I'm halfway through already. I thought her picture on the back jacket flap thingy looked familiar, so I read the author info. She was that blond P.E. teacher on that old Amy Sedaris show, Strangers With Candy. Man! If you thought that show was warped, you should read about this gal's childhood!

I spent the early afternoon updating myself on Big Brother 8. They are up to shenanigans in that house. Julie Chen should stay far, far away. The houseguests need to gang up on Evel Dick. He is a nogoodnik, that aging wannabe Keith Richards. And CBS should stop making fun of the God Squad for their religious beliefs. I didn't notice them playing churchy organ music when their precious Kaysar knelt on his prayer rug several times per day during BB6 and BB AllStars. Religion is religion. Make fun of all, or make fun of none.

Who wants to work at NORAD? Can I see a show of hands? Because for one thing, I would imagine it's one of the most stressful jobs in the world, searching the skies for impending doom day in and day out. On the other hand, you could sit smugly at your work station all day, thinking, "If the world gets nuked, I'm going to survive for a year here inside Cheyenne Mountain. Suckers!"

CiCi's Pizza is on the downhill slide. They raised their prices by about $.50, and lowered their food quality by about 90 percent. The lettuce in the regular salad and the Caesar salad was brown around the edges. They don't put out cheese anymore. The pizza sucks as much as ever. The dessert sweet roll thingies are always hardened, because people see they've been left out too long and won't eat them, and the workers see there are still some on the pan and won't bring out new ones. The brownies are raw in the middle and crunchy around the edge of the pan. The plates are always wet. They are always out of silverware, especially knives. The workers accosted our table no less than 11 times asking if we were done with plates, yet left our skanky, ranch dressing bespoiled tray sitting on the wall right over our table. The good news is that both boys ate a lot of noodles. Here is my theory with the service. People don't like the food, so leave a lot of it on the plates. Like, "That kind is terrible, I'm going to try something else." Then they fill a new plate with more food they don't like. Don't cost nothin'. This, in turn, causes a shortage of plates, so the workers must scavenge constantly to fill the dishwashers.

And now you'll have to excuse me while I get back to reading my BB8 updates, and my book. I'm sure you all remember that Mrs. Hillbilly Mom has a thirst for knowledge. In fact, she yearns for it.


Cazzie!!! said...

You wrote a good amount for not being interested..and I liked reading it..have a good weekend okay

Mean Teacher said...

Sounds like CiCi's could probably solve their entire problem by just keeping things fresher. Even if they have to eat some loss (pun alert) they'd make it back in what they'd save on displeased customers and the detergent it takes to wash all those plates.

And Amen on bashing all religions equally. It pisses me off that Islam, Judaism, and pretty much any other non-Christian religion is respected while Christianity is constantly made fun of and put down like it's made up of a bunch of dumbasses who don't have the same religious freedom or deserve the same respect.

I do have to admit that Christians sometimes contribute to this by trivializing their own religion, but that's an entire blog post. Hey, maybe I'll write it today.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Yes, you can all see how action-packed my days are during the summer vacation. When school starts, I imagine things will pick up, but I will be afraid to write about them.

Wow! You could, like, become the CEO of CiCi's, dude!

We're on the same page with that religion thingy. It's all or none.