Friday, April 11, 2008

The Weenus Rears Its Ugly Head Again

A long time ago, on a previous blog listed somewhere on my sidebar, I spoke of the weenus. I believe it was noted in my Encyclopedia of Common Knowledge, but I'm not sure. I thought we had laid the weenus to rest. No. Today, the weenus rose again.

Let me begin by clarifying, in case you can't tell, that Mrs. Hillbilly Mom is no fan of the weenus. Unlike 'knowledge', she does not have a thirst for them, nor does she yearn for them. That's a fact, Jack. This is not a real word, people! It is a made-up thingy. It is not found in anatomy books. Get over your weenuses, already!

Here's the situation, as it went down:
A boy in my class of juniors and seniors, we shall call him Chip, came in late from donating blood. I would like to think he had altruistic motives, but my common sense tells me that he wanted to get out of class and have a snack. He mentioned that he wished he had told them not to use his right arm, because it hurt. And the following hilarity ensued...

Dude, why didn't you tell them to put it in your weenus?
What's a weenus?
That skin on you elbow, where it won't hurt.
Here we go again! That's not it. Weenus is not even a real word.
It is too! Just ask Mrs. Downthehallscienceteacher. Can I go ask her?
No. Just tell her to let me know on her next trip up the hall.
Can I get on your computer and look it up?
No way. I don't want my computer to show that I've been searching for weenus.
Do you have a dictionary?
Yes. In the cabinet.
How do you spell it?
W E N I S. (That was from Chip, who had never heard of it until today.)
The tide rolls in and out.
The seasons change.
Mrs. HM grows a long white beard.

Well, I can't find weenus. But I found 'weenie'.
What does that mean? (Chip has a thirst for knowledge as well. Who knew?)
It means little bitty.
Heh heh.
That will be enough reciting from the dictionary for today.
Seriously, ask Mrs. Downthehallscienceteacher. She'll tell you.

Please, please, Sweet Gummi Mary, do not let her tell me that. Don't make me dig up some anatomy texts to point out the lack of weenus.


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