Sunday, September 23, 2007

The Week Ahead

What will this week bring, I wonder. Last week of September. We're fast approaching the end of 1st quarter. Then it really goes fast until Christmas. I am getting into the routine. I have developed a truceful relationship with the students. If they don't rattle my cage, I won't rattle theirs. Nobody has tried to be a bad boy yet. I have only almost driven one student to tears. Hey! She's the sensitive type.

I am still waiting on further information from some cohorts on that prank I have lined up. I am eagerly anticipating the aftermath.

Mabel continues to remain unseen and unheard. Not that she's imaginary or anything.

Some people need a filter. I, for one, would never say that I found 6 really big rats in my house. And a nest of hairless baby rats. Even if I did find such a thing. But I didn't. But if I did, I sure wouldn't talk about it for all to hear, like it was the most normal thing in the world. Sometimes I have to practice my not-recoiling-in-horror response.

Other people are born pure evil, and will remain pure evil, no matter how much you dress them up and parade them around in a role model kind of way. Not that I am dressing anybody or anything. I am the poster hillbilly for bad fashion.

Have you ever noticed on the news that teachers have absolutely the worst style and haircuts of any profession? I mean it. Just by watching a group file out of a meeting on the news, I can tell when they are teachers. Even if the sound is off, I can tell. Usually it's a union vote on some issue in the city schools, but I'm tellin' you...it is not hard to spot the teacher chic. It may seem that I am calling the kettle black, what with a post sometime in my past that began with: "I forked my hair today." But I still proclaim that forking one's hair is better than not combing it at all. Disclaimer: Of course all of the people I currently work with are not so slovenly in their appearance as teachers in schools that I don't work with. Aha! Snuck in that preposition-ender.

I have some major lesson-planning to do tonight, so I regret that I can not continue with this high level of humor.

The school year is almost over, you know.

3 comments:

Betty said...

We checked into a Kansas City hotel just as a teacher's convention had ended and the teachers had checked out. In the lounge, my husband ordered a bourbon and coke. The waiter said, " You're not a teacher, I can tell." Hubby said, "Why?" The waiter said, "Because the teachers ALL want drinks with fruit and little unbrellas in them. "

Stewed Hamm said...

I could almost go with you on the bad hair thing... but then there's ex-Congressman Jim Trafficant. His bad hair is legendary. His hair is so epically bad, that the Iliad is dedicated to it.

If you need extra cat pictures for your prank-o-thon, just say the word.

Word Verification: porkpeb - Pork Peb - A non-existent part of a pig, sold as snack food. It is analogous to chicken "fingers" or "McNuggets."

Hillbilly Mom said...

Betty,
Yes, I can see that. They were probably wearing some lovely Hawaiian shirts to sip their fruity drinks in. While dreaming of ending sentences with prepositions.

Stewyoumavenoftheclassics,
I'll take your word for it. I've only read The Odyssey. Thanks to Mr. K and his lofty goals for 9th grade Comm Arts. I only wish K was here for the pranking. This involves Basementia, and I'm doing it on the sly. Except that one stick won't come out of the mud so we can get this show on the road to Prankyville.

The Pork Peb made me throw up a little bit in my mouth.