Wednesday, September 12, 2007

How Sad

Oh, yeah. I have to write a blog post tonight. How time flies when you are on the Histinex. I made it from 5:30 last night until 5:30 tonight without taking any cough medicine. My lungs are on the mend, but my snot is running the show. Heh, heh. Snot...running...get it? I'm so clever. One thing they should include on the sweet, sweet Histinex label is this side effect: worsens spelling. Do not write professional documents until you know how your body will adjust.

Not that this is a professional document. I'm needing to type up 3 tests tonight. Great Googley Moogley! I'd better get busy! Anyhoo, I can't just use those tests that come with the textbook. They have all that matching and true-false mumbo jumbo. We are supposed to be teaching those little minds to flex their muscles, not limp-noodlishly guess which choice to select.

It seems like I had a point when I sat down here. It escapes me now. Sweet, sweet Histinex. Better than Benadryl. Except for a broken arm. Not a 'brokem are' as I first typed. Perhaps I should jsut let thigs come out as they may. It will look like those letters my mother used to type me when I was in college. She drug out the typewriter, and thouht is would be fun to type instead of write. Hey! There were even telepheses back then. And I don't mean the tin acn and string kind. Yet she chose to type. Those things were hilarouid. Much better than the phnone calls that I got from her on Sunday morninga at 9:00, when she would say repeatedly in the middle of other sentences: :There's somebody there, isn't there?" I dont' know what she was insinuating. As if I would have a sleepover guest on a Satureday dnight that woul still be there on Sunday morning. The nereve of that woman! Gosh. This is making me look like I'm not goint toi be the next Teacher of the Yar. How sad.

Yeah. I sust don't get it. This always happens when I take the sweet, sweet, Histinex. It takes me twice as long to post, becuase I have to correct my new plthora of errors. Well I ain't a-doin' it tonight. What you see is what you get. I supose it's a good thing that I dont' take the Sweet H while I'm going to be driving. Methinks it must be some type of narcotic. Though I did see on onte of those Cpperish shows that some criminals dipped their cigars into the stuff. Not in my Sweet H, buddy. None o fthose commercials wigh us being all cutesy and saying "You got gigar in my Histinex!: "No, you got Histines in my cigr!"

Sweet Gummi Mary! I mstu end this exer ise in futility. I can only imagine ihow painful it must be for eyou to read. Though I ghing I've just ginve you a glimpes inside Mean Teacher's workld. A nd the red pen doesn't womrk on the monitor, by cracky!

I'm going to get a nicesoft pillow an dput it here on the keyboard. I have sletp about 12 hours since Satuerday night. OK, so I told the kids it was 8 hours, but I'm allowed to lie to them. I'm thier teacher. Wha ws I talking about again? I think thsoe keys stick. they are not typing what I want. I ned that pillow becuae my head is going to fall over any minte when I drowse off. At which point i lill wump up, throw my arms in the air in a V shape, and shout, "Just resting my eyes!: Which is what my dad used to do when he would fall asleep in his chair by the fireplce so that he looked like a bobble0hear doll, and its a wonder he didn't break ihis nexk dong that all evening. Except that he didnt' rall y jump iup--he jsut looked around like a stranger in a asteraned land and announced about the eye-resting.

I'm otta here. I hope the kids like the test I make up for them. Somehinhg tells me I should take a little np befeore starting that bit of typing. Later, gatore!


Queen Of Cheese said...

I must remember to ask my Dr. for Histinex at my next visit. Sorry I've disappeared again into oblivion, you would not believe the kind of crap one goes through to be Queen!

Mean Teacher said...

The kids I have this year are MUCH better writers, but I still get lots of "u r" instead of "You are" and "gurl" instead of "girl." Text talk. Pisses me off.

Hillbilly Mom said...

I highly recommend it. Get your kingdom under control, and bring on the cheese.

Me, not so much. It's mainly people.