Friday, May 16, 2008

Random Thought Thriday, 5/16/08

I must combine Thursday and Friday. It's the least I can do. I was in no mood to sit down some more and type when I got home last night. I needed a recliner. Needed it bad. There's a good story there, but it will have to wait until Saturday. Random thoughts are percolating.

Funny thing, all the way through Elementia, my kids did not sing actual Christmas carols at the Christmas Program. I assumed it was because we can't reference religion, in case some patron might find it offensive. Never mind that Halloween became 'Fall Festival' because the religious people were offended. Like playing the race card in the Presidential Election, it apparently is a swinging door that works only one way. Imagine my surprise at the 90-minute choir concert last night when every single song was religious or in a foreign language or in Latin or was written by the instructor. All except a medley from Queen. Figure that one out.

Students are trying to get my goat. Or to be specific, they have succeeded in getting my Puffs With Aloe right off my desk. I'm not one of those teachers (like Mabel's old buddy) who refuse to buy tissues, and plop a roll of school toilet paper on their desks for noseblowing. No. Only the best for MY kids--Puffs With Aloe. And what thanks do I get? The heathens who have no honor swiped them to stuff into their Egg Drop containers (due today) that they created on the spur of the moment from a school milk carton and MY TISSUES.

I'm incensed about a lack of recognition for my little genius regarding a major accomplishment. More on THAT tomorrow. I know Mabel will have my back.

The Mansion has been invaded by creepy crawlies. It must be all the rain. Just this morning, as I plopped down on the (ahem) throne, I caught movement out of the corner of my eye. Black on white. A black CRICKET in my white shower. That is OH SO WRONG. I hate crickets with a passion. They jump, people. Just when you think, "Aha! I've got you now!" they jump. I nabbed him with a wad of toilet paper. The good kind that bears use in the woods. I dropped him in the toilet, and before I could flush, he jumped up on the side. I slammed down the lid and flushed for all I was worth. I checked all up under the seat and sides. I think I got him. But I don't like the thought of sitting down and having him lurking below my nether regions. Oh, but he had a guest. When we got home this evening, the #1 son went out through the laundry room door to the back porch to look at Poolio. I feared that Poolio was getting too full of himself from all the rain. The boy came back in and shut the door. I glanced down, and saw, a single millimeter (I can judge a millimeter, people--I'm a science teacher, you know) from my son's foot, a big ol' hairy spider. It was about the size of a silver dollar, mostly black or gray with a yellow threaded pattern around his legs. I screamed, "WATCH OUT!" That scared two years' growth out of the young whippersnapper. Then he saw the spider. He squealed like a schoolgirl. I said, "Get it!" He whimpered, "I can't." Geez. How's he ever going to capture a wife? At least he knows how to program a VCR and set the thermostat.

I know somebody who's getting married. We're not close. I'm not even going. But I think it is a case of a true-life 40-year-old virgin. Really.

The head of the future cooks and cleaning ladies of America handed out Egg Babies yesterday. How thoughtful of her to coincide with my Egg Drop contest of today. Oh, the humanity! One of my students accosted me in the hall after school to ask if I wanted to be the God Aunt of her fowl offspring. I asked if it would cost anything. This sponsor is a whiz at making money out of nothing. In fact, the kids say they leave their Egg Babies in the 'daycare' in her room during school so they don't break them. I'm sure this daycare is not free. Anyhoo, I was assured that it would cost me anything. The student was gone today with some activity. I made a hat with a cotton-ball tuft, a matching purple polka dot dress, and a fancy schmancy gift box with a purple bow. OK. So they were all made out of copy paper and a dry-erase marker and a cotton ball left over from an Egg Drop container. It's the thought that counts.

Some people have too much time on their hands.

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